I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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