we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize