I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
