i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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