I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
