Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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