she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
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