Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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