Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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