I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Randomize
