You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
