Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
