I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I am available for nakedness
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Oh god it's open bar.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
