Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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