If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
