I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
