I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
