I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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