Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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