i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize