dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
