i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
