I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
