the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
