What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize