Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
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