the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
