Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
