Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
