K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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