White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
