As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
