Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
