Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
