I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
