I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize