Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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