I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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