Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
