It was confusing and full of hummus
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
