she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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