Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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