dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
