if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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