also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
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