oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
