he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
