Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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