I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Randomize
