it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
