Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I'm too high and old for this...
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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